On The Sniff

This week there's plenty from the usual suspects plus a look at brainless footballers, exaggerating agents and poor schooling.

The international break usually comes as a welcome relief to both the Hound and the group of miscreants who run Football365.co.za. There's been plenty of moaning from footballers and managers alike about the congestion of the truncated PSL season but no-one seems to spare a thought for the poor journos, who have to cover this excess of games.

While the layman may think it's a cushy job to watch and write about football, the truth is far more sinister and boring. Imagine eating a dinner of boiled rice every night for the rest of your life while spending your days polishing turds and you're still nowhere near understanding the tedium of trying to write an exciting match report on a 0-0 draw between Jomo Cosmos and Free State Stars.

But the Hound is the first to admit that there are some perks to the profession, and chief amongst them is the right, nay the duty, to poke fun at the rest of the idiots in the media.

An exclusive crowd

It takes a substantial set of family jewels to brazenly claim quotes from a press conference as exclusive content, therefore Kickoff probably deserve admiration for claiming that their article: Parreira defends Santana, published at 13h15 on Friday, was an exclusive.

'Eight defeats in nine games is a poor record for any coach, but Bafana were losing to big countries," he (Santana) told KickOff.com at a press conference in Newtown, Johannesburg.'

The Hound's colleagues attended the same press conference and strangely enough, this wonderful site published the following quote:

'Eight defeats from nine games is a poor record but we will have benefited from playing against that standard of teams.'

Apart from the slight difference in translation and the fact that we didn't deign to claim quotes from a press conference as exclusive, as you can see here our version was published a good 2-and-a-half hours earlier.

A slight difference of opinion

Strach can't persuade Johnson (SkySports)

Strachan: I can persuade Johnson (TEAMtalk)

Geographically challenged special

There are evenings when the Hound lies awake, pondering the state of education in this country and weeping like Joost van der Westhuizen at a press conference.

"Some of the players who were expected to provide goals for their respective clubs include the Ajax Cape Town duo of Mohammed Diallo, who hails from Belgium, and Aboubacar Fofana of Guinea." - Patrick Baloyi of Sunday World decides unanimously that, having played in Belgium, Mohammed Diallo is no longer an Ivory Coast National.

"The Port-Elizabeth youngster is destined for big things. The 19-year-old has a massive reputation to live up to, being named as one of the world's top 50 most exciting teen footballers in 2007 and ranked among such impressive talents such as Pato of AC Milan, and Theo Walcott of Spain." - Ryan Hoffman of the Mail & Guardian has some bad news for Fabio Capello.

Lobotomy of the week

Mabhuti Khenyeza.

Missing a Bafana call-up once can be charitably ascribed to an error or poor judgement. Doing so a second time shows not only a complete lack of a functioning brain, but also a disgusting contempt for the Bafana Bafana supporters.

Khenyeza should never be allowed anywhere near the national team again.

The paymasters have spoken

Football365's mighty overlord Mr Rupert Murdoch unleashed a veritable sh*tstorm this week when he threatened that Newscorp, the giant media conglomerate of which this wonderful site is a microscopic part, is planning to make readers pay to access its content.

"I think we've been asleep," he said. "It costs us a lot of money to put together good newspapers and good content. They're very happy to pay for it when they buy a newspaper, and I think when they read it elsewhere they're going to have to pay. Not huge sums. You'd be surprised how much can be done, how cheaply, into the average home."

He even threatened to take on the might of Google, who, in fairness, have gotten away with borderline extortion for too long.

"I think we will (prevent google search results). We do it already, with The Wall Street Journal. We have a wall, but it's not right to the ceiling. You can get the first paragraph of any story, but if you're not a paying subscriber to WSJ.com, you get a paragraph and a subscription form."

Due to a healthy sense of self-preservation, On the Sniff would never criticise Mr Murdoch. He just hopes that some of the money will trickle down as he has a fresh litter of runty puppies to support.

Dedicated SAPA Section

From a SAPA story published on Wednesday 11 November: "Japan's players have been instructed not to leave their hotel after dark while they are in South Africa for the match in Durban."

Now we know the game has been moved a few times, but Port Elizabeth was confirmed a few weeks ago. Anybody home?

Quote of the week

"Sometimes there are challenges that can assassinate you. A defender could get five matches for throwing his shirt and the player who broke the leg of Eduardo only had a three-game suspension." - Bruno Satin, agent of Liverpool diver David Ngog, defending his client.